Q&A Wife Won’t Admit She Needs Therapy

QUESTION My wife has symptoms of depression and paranoia. She has never been officially diagnosed because she won’t go in to see a therapist. She is high functioning in everyday type activities, but is unable to allow herself to be loved by me or other adults because she doesn’t believe we are sincere in our expressions or actions. She has also pushed friends and family out of her life...
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QUESTION: Years ago I bought your little book “A Better Way” after you spoke in our stake in Parker, CO. I love this book and all you teach in it. My daughter really wants this book, but we don’t see it available. Is it available? If not, which of your other books do you recommend? Which one most closely teaches what is in that book? ANSWER: Wow, that’s an echo from the past...
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Healing from a Hurtful Mother

QUESTION I am a mother of three young beautiful children, soon to be four at the end of this week. As I try hard to follow the Lord’s way in raising our children, I am overcome more and more by feelings of inadequacy, guilt and worthlessness. I have found myself reflecting on my own upbringing with a widowed mother (my father died when I was 5) who is very volatile and aggressive. Although she...
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Q&A: ABUSIVE SISTER, ENABLING FAMILY

QUESTION: My older sister has been emotionally abusive to me, two younger sisters, and (when they tried to step in and help) my parents.  She has manipulated others in the family to believe that we have mistreated her, even though they will admit that she overreacts to things, and gets upset and lashes out when things do not go her way.  Three siblings said things, in front of the entire family,...
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Q&A I have a daughter who lies

QUESTION  My oldest daughter, Krista (not her real name) will turn 8 soon and be baptized. Krista has always struggled with lying. She will carry on a lie for an hour, even when we know 100% that she is lying. Yesterday for instance, she lied for 45 minutes about taking a bite of a piece of old food in the car that had fallen under a seat. I knew she was lying, because I saw the food in her mouth,...
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Q&A Is There Celestial Hope for One Who has Never Suffered Greatly?

QUESTION I read Choosing Glory yesterday and loved it. I just wanted to comment on the idea that suffering is the route to changing terrestrial to celestial. My life is one of peace, joy, service, love and deep-seated contentment. I can honestly say I have no trials in my life, only blessings. My husband is faithful, kind, has integrity and loves me. He has been gainfully employed our whole marriage...
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Supporting Traditional Marriage

I recently got an email from a former BYU student, now doing doctoral work in engineering in the Midwest. This young man wrote: I have a co-worker with whom I have been discussing the issue of same-sex marriage and the repercussions on society. He is pro-family in a traditional sense, but is unsure on his political responsibility in that regard. The co-worker said to me: “The real issue I...
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Q&A Response to an Abusive Marriage

QUESTION I was married in the Temple 18 years ago and I have 6 children living at home.  My marriage has been continually emotionally and at times physically abusive. My husband’s anger and rage lie just beneath the surface and we live in fear that he will explode at any moment.  I have asked my husband if we could please talk with our Bishop and he becomes enraged and refuses to talk to him....
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Q&A Limits to Listening

(Note from Lili: My apologies to some who submit questions and wait a long time for an answer. Thanks for your patience. Thanks, too, to all who read and comment. I really appreciate your thoughts.) QUESTION I saw your August 2010 Ed Week presentation on BYU TV (dealing with hurt and anger).  It was excellent!  My question is a side topic related to a point you mentioned in the presentation. I am...
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