Comments on: Honesty is Still the Best Policy

By: Lili

Lili — Thu, 12 Nov 2009 01:07:12 +0000

Another insightful point. Everything works better when we’re healthy. Everything is more complicated when we’re not. In my experience working with people, I’m happy to say, I do find that people who are sincerely trying to be honest generally can be.

By: Pops

Pops — Sun, 08 Nov 2009 16:43:13 +0000

Yes, the two questions do work well. And if it weren’t for the near-infinite human capacity for self-deception, they would work very well indeed.

One’s idea of “legitimate consequences” can unfortunately be twisted, both by self-deception as well as by improper training. A person with ingrained low self-esteem, for example, might consider abject humiliation and being outcast as legitimate consequences of their every action, or perhaps even their existence.

By: Lili

Lili — Fri, 06 Nov 2009 23:10:45 +0000

You’re right, “Pops,” I would find it tough to make those kinds of calls in a basketball game. And while I readily acknowledge that life can present gray areas, I also am confident that MOST of our questions about honesty can be answered if we (honestly) consider these two questions:

1-Am I withholding or distorting the truth to exploit or manipulate someone?

2- Am I withholding or distorting the truth to avoid responsibility or legitimate consequences for my choices?

Those two questions really do clear up a lot of what might be considered “gray areas.”

By: Pops

Pops — Fri, 06 Nov 2009 04:04:28 +0000

When talking extremes, it’s easy to see the difference. But what about the gray area that lies somewhere in between the two? In basketball, there’s the touch to locate the opponent – no harm, no foul – and the elbow to the face. It’s easy to tell that one is okay and the other wrong. But what about the pushing and leaning? How do you draw the line? How do keep away from the slippery slope?